I can't believe I'm already to 38 weeks.
The last half of this pregnancy has FLOWN by. Honestly, ever since the unbearable sickness faded away, it's been an amazing pregnancy. This week I've been feeling cramping, increased discharge (TMI), and some minor swelling in my feet. I've gained less weight this time around, which has me feeling really accomplished. The best part? I found out at my appointment on Wednesday that I am already dilated to a 3 and 50% effaced which was extremely comforting!
The fact that my body is progressing more already than it did before going into labor last pregnancy is such a relief. I finally feel the comforting feeling, my husband has been trying to convince me of for months now, that this labor is going to be a much more pleasant experience. The biggest comfort of all is that I know what to expect. I know my body has done it before and is already preparing for the big stretch. (Baby Mama, anyone?) And last but not least, I know that I can do it regardless of how it turns out!
I'm scheduled to be induced on the 11th at 9 am, but it could still happen on it's own before then. I did test positive for Group B Strep again, so that was kind of a bummer because I need to be on penicillin for a certain amount of time before pushing to make sure the bacteria doesn't spread to the baby. It's nothing I haven't been able to handle before though! Bring it on!
Starting today I'm doing all the squats, long walks, and other natural labor inductive behaviors to welcome this baby here as soon as he wants to come! (Find out on my previous post why I have been hoping he didn't come until April) The bags are all packed, Matthew is driving the car to work instead of taking the train, and the renovations on the big boy room and nursery are complete!
I often find myself sitting in the rocker of the nursery, dreaming of holding our sweet baby in my arms. I couldn't be more anxious to meet our little moon boy and compare his uniquely perfect face to our not so little Turner. Did I mention already that the doctor noticed hair in his ultrasounds? Turner was completely bald, and I'm freaking out that I might have a little guy with some hair!
The thing I look forward to the most is that moment you see them for the first time. It's like time stands still and all you can do is smile, laugh and cry at the same time. You feel so much love in an instant it completely overwhelms you. It's magical, in the most spiritual way.
Bearing children is such a wonderful gift. I'm so grateful to be a part of it all. It's at this point of my pregnancy that I feel conflicted with emotion about this sweet baby exiting my womb that I've carried him in for so long. I am one of those mama's who misses that feeling of being a vessel to life. When it's empty I struggle with it at first. Luckily, a sweet newborn to finally hold and cuddle and love makes up for a lot of that. I'll never stop loving the beauty of pregnancy. Never. But boy am I ready to hold an innocent little one from heaven in my arms again. We love him so much already.